Title: All Hallow’s Children

Date written: Sat 27 Dec 2003

Author: Starway Man

E-mail: theop@kew.hotkey.net.au

Disclaimer: The Buffy the Vampire Slayer characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar, Kuzui, WB and UPN. This story is an adaptation of the BtVS season 2 episode “Halloween” written by Carl Ellsworth and transcribed by AleXander Thompson; so I can’t claim credit for some of it, only the rewritten material for this fanfic. Similarly all the Highlander stuff belongs to Greg Widen and Panzer/Davis; and the Tomb Raider references are owned by Eidos

Rating: R

Warnings: Some violence, attempted assault and character death is present. Plus there are spoilers for just about everything on both shows, up to mid-season 5 of Angel

Main characters: Ensemble

Ships: Some Buffy/Angel, Cordelia/Devon, Dru/Spike, pre-Willow/Oz and Cordelia/Xander

Acknowledgments: Thanks to www.slayerfanfic.com for the episode transcript way back when, that is used in parts of this story; and to Mike and Nodakskip for helpful comments and suggestions

Classification: Action-Adventure, Mystery, Crossover, Alternate Universe

Summary: A seer meets Ethan Rayne during 1997, and the events of “Halloween” turn out differently as the Scooby gang is manipulated by the duo.

~~~~~~

“In the end, we all are who we are...no matter how much we may appear to have changed.” (Rupert Giles, BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER)

“Can I say something about destiny? Screw destiny!” (Winifred Burkle, ANGEL)

“Do you think we ever lived like this? Like a tribe, with a name and a reason for each living thing? Did we ever belong somewhere...a time...a place...however briefly?” (Connor MacLeod, HIGHLANDER)

~~~~~~

Wednesday, October 29th, 1997

That night in Sunnydale, California – demons were out wandering around. Vampires were busy killing and maiming. And most sensible humans were sitting indoors at the dinner table, about to have a decent meal. But the Englishman known as Ethan Rayne was having a conversation in his costume shop, with a figure wearing long gray robes and a hood.

The robed figure was in fact a woman, and she said in a British accent, “So, do we have an agreement? Will you do it?”

The man, who was notorious for his many activities of dubious repute, just asked with narrowed eyes, “I don’t particularly care about how you knew what I was planning, but...why exactly do you want this little ‘favour’ done? I mean, really...”

The woman replied, “I have my reasons. And besides, chaos is not a tool to be used for your own amusement, Ethan. Persist in doing so – and it’ll be your downfall, in a few years at most. What I’m offering you is the opportunity to truly serve Janus – which you will, if you do what I ask...”

The guy in question wasn’t convinced. “That sounds like a load of utter drivel – coming from someone like yourself, I’ll have you know.”

His companion sighed. “Perhaps. Very well – you should realize I’ve recently met with the oracle known as Beljoxa’s eye, who suggested I talk to the Spirit Guides-”

“Who?”

“Entities who exist outside of space and time. And they told me what I wanted to know – for a price. I have specific detailed knowledge of the upcoming future, Ethan. Of the possibility to induce complete chaos in this world, and even you need the planet intact to ply your trade. So now, as you can see, other arrangements must be made.”

Ethan was still suspicious. “What price did you pay?” She hesitated. “Come now, Mrs. Harkness, I won’t show you mine if you won’t show me yours...”

Mrs. Harkness pulled back her hood, and the man finally saw her face. The middle-aged woman was blind, with her eye sockets now mutilated and completely empty.

Rayne shrugged at her in distaste, “Fine; we have ourselves a deal, then...”

~~~~~~

A bit later the young man called Xander Harris walked into the only warehouse club in town, after an anonymous telephone call earlier at home from a lady with a British accent. < Wednesday night at the Bronze, just 'cause some woman I don’t even know told me I needed to be here. It’s official; not only am I dateless and desperate, I gotta get me a life... >

Elsewhere within the club, the young woman known as Cordelia Chase started talking to the vampire with a soul called Angel. “I know. Is the Bronze so not happening? Or what?” She set down her drink, and sat next to the handsome undead guy.

Angel noticed her vaguely, “Oh. Hi.”

Cordelia smiled hungrily, “Hi!”

The vampire looked around and said, “I’m waiting for Buffy...” referring to his sort-of girlfriend, Buffy Summers – the current vampire Slayer.

His female admirer responded in a chipper way, “Great! I’m supposed to be meeting Devon, but he’s nowhere to be seen. It’s like he thinks being in a band gives him an obligation to flake.”

Angel smiled at the joke. Cordelia added, “Well, his loss is your incredible gain!”

Just then, seeing his life-long enemy hitting on the vamp he’d disliked from day one, Xander gave up looking for his mystery woman. He joined the dark-haired duo and commented in annoyance, “Ah, yes, I should have known you two birds of a feather would flock together – ya both suck the life outta the room in different ways, and all that!”

Angel ignored him, getting up and looking for his beloved. < Damn it, but that idiot boy can be annoying... >

Cordy got up too and then demanded to know in some confusion, “What are you talking about, you dork?”

Xander looked at Angel in honest surprise, “She doesn’t know you’re a vampire?”

“Yeah, right! Like he’s a cute studmuffin with fangs?” the modern-day princess laughed a moment later, after realizing from his words Angel knew about the Sunnydale nightlife.

The guys exchanged glances, and Xander shrugged. “She knows what’s what, my opinion – you may as well just show her...”

Angel instantly went into game face, displaying his demonic undead visage; and upon seeing it Cordelia started to scream, before Xander clapped a hand over her mouth and the vamp morphed back into his human mask.

After shoving him away, the most popular girl of Sunnydale High said angrily to the class clown, “You loser! How could you let me hit on a vampire like that?” Then to the former object of her affections, “And you! How dare you pretend to be a class A hunk – I mean God, no one so good-looking is allowed to be a monster!”

Angel shook his head, moving away slightly and trying to ignore her now too. But Xander couldn’t help making a wisecrack, “Well, Cordy, things could be worse; at least Angel’s a monster who’s one of the good guys, and so unfortunately won’t eat you. At least, not unless he’s having a really bad day...”

Buffy joined the group at that moment, after entering the club a bit disheveled from a fight with a vampire. An undead American that was now dust, and had been a mere stooge – and the fight had been staged and videotaped for the Master vampire called Spike, by another minion.

Angel greeted her softly, “Buffy...”

Xander looked around and also said brightly, “Hey, Buff!” but Cordelia just ignored the other girl.

The beautiful Slaymaster-General started to say, “Hi! I’m...”

The undead king of the brooding people completed the sentence, “Late.”

The so-called ‘B word’ then looked at him intensely. “Rough day at the office.”

Angel reached up to her hair, and pulled out a piece of straw. “So I see.”

Buffy tried to play it off, “Hey, it’s a look. A seasonal look!” The man she loved just stared at her though, and so she shrugged as if to say okay, that one truly was lame.

Xander asked in concern, “Everything okay with the Slayage, Buffy?” and the girl simply nodded yes to her bestest male bud.

Cordy got fed up with being ignored and decided to insult the Slayer, “Love the hair, Buffy. It just screams ‘street urchin’.”

But as the daughter of a tax cheat was about to leave Xander made a quip that hit hard in her mind, “Right, and we all know that with regards to hair, you’re like the established queen of split ends...?”

Cordy and Xander started to spar with the insults, as Buffy and Angel were forgotten; which was hardly anything new, as they had been bickering ever since they were 6 years old. Their companions just stared at them and then each other, as the war of ugly words started...

The Chase girl said with a nasty expression, “Xander, you know what you really need? A brain.”

The Harris boy replied in kind, “And what you really need, Cordy, is an outfit that doesn’t scream ‘hooker for hire’.”

She fired back, “At least I have clothes on that don’t say, ‘my father is an unemployed drunk’!”

He got pissed at that one, “Hey, at least I don’t have to depend on a dad whose idea of spending time with his child is to give her a charge card for unlimited shopping binges – so he can continue sleeping with his secretary! Or so I hear from my janitor uncle...”

Both Angel and Buffy were now very uncomfortable, but Cordelia just screamed in uninhibited fury and attacked Xander. An impassioned hair-pulling contest then took place between the two angry teenagers; and although they didn’t even realize it, many of the on-looking patrons in the Bronze were their classmates, who laughed and cheered them on.

Cordy’s so-called friends, Harmony Kendall and the group known as the Cordettes, in particular were watching the two tear into one another. The blonde airhead yelled out, “Cordelia! Kick him where it hurts!”

The other good-looking girls looked at her in surprise and a little distaste; Harmony replied, “What – when she asks why we weren’t interested enough to help, what are you guys gonna say?”

The sheep instantly began calling out in support as well, “Go, Cordelia!” “Kick his ass!” “Hit him in the gut!” and so on.

The high school senior called Daniel Osborne, or more commonly just Oz, noticed the commotion and started watching too – along with his friends Larry Blaisdell and Devon MacLeish. “Not good,” commented the guitarist, in his own Yoda-like monosyllabic way.

Larry was grinning, as Cordy had recently dumped him. “Go, Harris!”

Devon said in surprise, “You’re actually rooting for him? That’s my girlfriend! What, are you expecting me to yell out ‘go Harris!’ as well?” He then saw Harmony glaring at him, having spoken too loud; the lead singer for the band ‘Dingoes Ate My Baby’ just sighed, “Oh man, probably there goes my date for tomorrow night...”

Buffy had finally had enough of the duo’s antics; gesturing to the ensouled vamp she grabbed Cordy, Angel grabbed Xander, and the contestants got separated.

Both Slayer and vampire then told their captive fighter, “Calm down!” as they struggled to get back to the battle. Both Cordelia and Xander stopped, and looked around to see practically everyone in the club staring; and then they just stared at each other, feeling horribly embarrassed.

Xander shoved Angel away, and simply left the Bronze. Cordy pushed Buffy away too, as she joined the Cordettes and started to seriously bad-mouth the dark-haired boy with a vengeance.

The Slayer sighed, “I swear, one day those two are gonna be the death of me...”

As she relaxed into his embrace, Angel just told Buffy in amusement, “You know, it’s funny, but I-I haven’t felt this human for a very long time...”

~~~~~~

Thursday, October 30th, 1997

The next day, sign-ups were being taken for the volunteer safety program for Halloween at the Sunnydale High School. The man in command, Principal H.R. Snyder took one of the clipboards, and looked around the hall he was in; he then grabbed the next girl to walk by, and pulled her aside.

The student said indignantly, “Hey!”

Snyder was in no mood for any crap, though. “You’re volunteering.”

He held out the clipboard and pen to her, as Buffy, Xander and their friend called Willow Rosenberg came in from the other hall. The high school commandant thought to himself, < And hurry up, you pathetic little miscreant. I haven’t got all day... >

The cornered schoolgirl tried vainly to get out of being entrapped into something she really didn’t want to do, “But I have to get to class...”

Snyder just shrugged, not caring. The Scoobies then walked past him as Willow said, “Snyder must be in charge of the volunteer safety program for Halloween this year.”

Xander said cynically, “Note his interesting take on the ‘volunteer’ concept.”

Buffy asked, “What’s the deal?”

After they reached Willow’s locker, she worked the combination as Xander told the Slayer, “Oh, a bunch of little kids need people to take them trick-or-treating. Sign up and get your own pack of sugar-hyped little runts for the night.”

Buffy was aghast at the concept. “Yikes. I’ll stick to vampires.”

Then one of the worst things possible took place; Snyder put his hand on her shoulder, and she spun around to face him. The so-called little Ferengi said simply, “Miss Summers. Just the juvenile delinquent I’ve been looking for.”

Buffy looked very afraid. “Principal Snyder!”

Snyder definitely had a look on his face. “Halloween must be a big night for you. Tossing eggs, keying cars, bobbing for apples, one pathetic cry for help after another. Well...” He led her to the sign-up table, “Not this year, missy.”

Willow and Xander came to stand behind her, as Buffy tried to get out of it like the other girl of some moments before. “Gosh, I’d love to sign up; but I recently developed carpal tunnel syndrome, and can tragically no longer hold a flashlight...”

Snyder just held up the clipboard and pen. “The program starts at four, the children have to be back at six.”

Realizing it was hopeless Buffy reluctantly grabbed the pen and clipboard, and signed herself up. Xander couldn’t help thinking it was pretty damn funny, and smiled at Willow. But his best friend from ever since they were just squalling infants had a concerned look on her face, as Snyder then held pens out to the both of them.

The two teens both looked at him, silently begging not to be put through this.

No dice. Willow gave in first, and took the pen with a feeling of upcoming doom...

~~~~~~

Later in another part of the hall, Xander said fuming, “I can’t believe this. We have to get dressed up and the whole deal?”

Willow nodded. “Snyder said costumes were mandatory.”

Buffy looked miserable. “Great. I was gonna stay in and veg, the one night a year things are supposed to be quiet for me...”

Xander was surprised at hearing that, “Halloween quiet? Oh, I figured it’d be a big old vamp scare-a-palooza.”

They walked into the student lounge as Buffy said, “Not according to Giles. He swears that tomorrow night is, like, dead for the undead.” She added as the girls sat down, “They stay in.”

Xander quipped with a big smile, “Those wacky vampires! That’s why I love 'em! They just keep you guessing!”

The guy put his satchel down on the table, and headed over to the soda vending machine. Xander then put in his coins, and hit a button. Nothing happened.

Annoyed, the young man hit another one. Still nothing. < Damn soda machine! Eat my money, will you? > The kid then hit the cursed thing in the front and on the side, in rising frustration.

Larry came up to him, and the 16-year-old boy briefly put his big meaty hand on Xander’s shoulder. “Harris!”

The heart of the Scooby gang was somewhat uneasy at the encounter, “Hey, Lar. You’re lookin’ Cro-Mag as usual. What can I do you for?”

Larry asked immediately, “You and Buffy, you’re just friends, right?”

Xander prevaricated, “I like to think of it less as a friendship, and more as a solid foundation for future bliss.”

The football player insisted on knowing though, “So, she, she’s not your girlfriend?”

The soon-to-be demon magnet then gave in and admitted, “Alas, no.”

Oz’s pal looked over at Buffy, as he walked around Xander. “Do you think she’d go out with me?” He turned to face his interlocutor, with the blonde heroine to his back now.

The perspective guy said at once, “Well, Lar, that’s a tough question to...no. Not a chance.”

Larry obviously wasn’t happy about hearing that. “Why not? I heard some guys say she was fast.”

Xander got defensive, “I hope you mean like the wind.”

The big meathead sent him a leery look, “Yeah, you know what I mean.”

Buffy’s so-called white knight said indignantly, “That’s my friend that you’re talkin’ about!”

Larry smirked, “Oh, yeah? Well, what’re you gonna do about it?”

The potential ICU patient said immediately, “I’m gonna do what any man would do about it...” and then he grabbed Larry by the shirt, “Somethin’ damn manly!”

Larry just smiled and laughed. He then effortlessly knocked Xander’s hands away, and grabbed him by the shirt with his right hand. Balling his left hand into a fist, the guy drew back for a vicious punch; but Buffy grabbed his wrist, pulled it behind his back and slammed his head into the vending machine.

The eldest of the Chosen Two said dangerously, “Get-”

But before she could finish or shove him away, Xander finished going through his flashback of what had happened the previous night; how Angel had dragged him off Cordy that way. He felt the shame all over again, and had an almost prophetic vision of more teenage male humiliation; so the youth decided to do something about it.

Thus Xander interrupted the Buff-meister, “Hey, hey, hey! Let the guy go and back off, okay Buff?” She looked at him strangely, but acceded to his wishes. Xander looked around then said, “Larry, we’re not done yet – but here and now’s not the time or place for this. We’ll settle up later...”

The quarterback looked at Buffy, astounded by her strength, and then jeered at his original target, “Not a problem. And let’s be honest – you actually think a worm like you, could take someone like me?”

The future Nighthawk said confidently, “Maybe you heard about the fight at the Bronze last night, how I made the guy who was bigger than me let go and move away? Plus, I’m really sure Buffy will go out with you, after you beat up a friend of hers in public...”

Larry briefly looked at the Slayer again and seemed to have an epiphany, “You planned this, just to ruin my chances with her!” He then promised the other teenager, “Yeah, another time, Harris...” before the guy left.

Buffy was about to say something, but Xander beat her to it. “Buffy, what did you think you were doing just now?! Why’d you butt in like that, it was like way outta line...”

The descendant of a long line of mystical warriors couldn’t believe this display of male stupidity. “But he was gonna pummel you! I’m your friend, I couldn’t just stand there and let you get hurt-”

“What? Buffy, reality check – unless it’s a demon we’re talkin’ about, you can’t fight my battles for me! You almost seriously violated the guy code here!”

It was obvious she didn’t like hearing that. “Really?”

“Buff, lemme clue you in on some of the facts of life from the ‘Y’ side of things. Guys – they eat of the beef, play sports, watch the action movie, check out the bosoms and often pummel each other, for no good reason. Look, I get that you just wanted to help – but still! You should know that a black eye heals, but cowardice has an unlimited shelf life! Next time, think before you do something like that again and almost completely embarrass me...”

Buffy shrugged, looking somewhat annoyed. “Fine. I promise that when Larry comes after you, I’ll stay out of it and let you guys beat each other to a pulp...” and then she went off to talk to Willow. Xander shook his head, and left the two of them to go at it.

~~~~~~

That night at Ethan’s costume shop, the store was full of mothers with their kids looking for Halloween costumes. Buffy was handling a plastic pumpkin, when it suddenly lit up and screamed. So she quickly put it back on the counter, as Willow came over to her.

Miss Summers asked her closest friend, “What’d you get?”

The future lesbian replied at once, “A time-honored classic!” She held up a ghost costume.

Buffy almost sighed in despair. “Okay, Will, can I give you a little friendly advice?”

Willow looked at her oddly. “It’s not spooky enough?”

The Buffinator dismissed that, “It’s just...you’re never gonna get noticed, if you keep hiding. Especially by Xander! You’re missing the whole point of Halloween.”

The brainy smurf just smiled. “Free candy?”

Buffy insisted, “It’s come-as-you-aren’t night. The perfect chance for a girl to get sexy and wild with no repercussions.”

Miss Rosenberg disagreed at once, her ingrained phobias surfacing. “Oh, I don’t get wild. Wild on me equals spaz.”

She who hung out in cemeteries a lot had faith in her friend. “Don’t underestimate yourself,” Buffy said firmly. “You’ve got it in you-”

The Knowledge Girl of the gang tried to distract the other female, “Hey, so where’s Xander? I didn’t think he’d be a no-show...”

It worked as Buffy moaned, “I think he’s still upset with me over that thing with Larry, that’s why he bailed even though we agreed...” Suddenly the Slayer was distracted by the sight of a costume, and trailed off. The Chosen One then slowly started walking over to a frilly, red, billowy 18th century gown, as Willow followed.

The blonde guardian of the Hellmouth said in deep appreciation as they arrived at their destination, “Whoa...look at this.”

The redhead’s beautiful green eyes went wide. “It’s amazing.”

Ethan noticed Buffy looking at the dress, and came over to them. “Please, let me...” the man said somewhat smarmily, as he took the dress off of its dressmaker’s mannequin.

The grown-up version of the former 8-year-old Power Girl stuttered, “Oh, i-it’s...”

Her secret enemy smiled, “Magnificent. Yes, I know. There.” He held it up in front of her, letting the young woman see herself in the mirror. “My, meet the hidden princess. I think we found a match, don’t you?”

Buffy looked at Ethan, indecision written all over her face. “Oh, uh, I-I’m sorry. There’s no way I could ever afford this.”

Rayne dismissed that at once, “Oh, nonsense. I feel quite moved to make you a deal you can’t refuse...”

The ‘one girl in all the world’ looked back into the mirror, taking the dress from Ethan and smiling dreamily as she held it up to her chin. < It’s the perfect dress for impressing Angel! Just like that 1775 noblewoman we saw in Giles’ Watcher diaries, a few hours ago. > “Okay, what kinda deal are we talking about?”

~~~~~~

A bit later Xander arrived late at the costume shop, due to bumping into Larry again and getting beaten up – but also somehow hurting his opponent enough to make him back off.

The X-man, with a black eye and bruises, watched Willow and Buffy leave the shop in surprise – even though they failed to see him do so. The male teen was close enough to hear the girls talking about the gown Buffy had gotten, and he quickly realized the blonde Slayer wanted to impress Angel with it.

Xander sighed, thinking about the vamp, < Okay, granted I hate his guts, but at least he was the one who pulled me off Cordy last night instead of the Buffster – or else my rep for being a sissy man, would be well and truly permanently established here... >

The femmes disappeared down the street, and Xander entered the store. He quickly asked Ethan, “I’m looking for a toy gun?”

At the Englishman’s stare, the only son of two drunks felt the need to clarify, “Okay, see, I got these fatigues from an Army surplus at home, I was kinda planning to go out tomorrow night as a soldier...”

The chaos worshipper smiled mysteriously. < I already know all that – as well as who you are, little boy... > But he just replied, “No need to explain. But sorry, I’m all out of those.”

Xander definitely started to look worried. Then he shrugged, “I got two dollars. What else can I afford?”

Ethan gestured, looking unconcerned, “Well, at this late date all I have is a mock Japanese katana...”

The young man then got a funny look. “Huh. Oh! Ya know what, I always wanted to dress up as one of my favorite movie characters, one of these Halloweens here...”

~~~~~~

Later that night, Ethan was serving Cordelia in his costume shop. The spoiled rich girl was the only customer in the store; and she complained while handing over some cash, “And another thing, can you say ‘limited inventory’? I can’t believe I actually had to lower myself to shopping here, at this late stage! Still – I promise you, Partytown is never going to get another dime out of me again, for refusing my credit cards like that...”

The middle-aged British man handed over the items bought without comment, even though he thought angrily to himself, < Screw the planet, nothing is worth this!! Mrs. Harkness, damn you for sending the razor-tongued harpy’s money in my direction with that spell... >

Then Ethan said a polite farewell – and as soon as she left, he closed up shop. The guy subsequently snarled, “Bloody stuck-up little tart! I hope you get everything what’s coming to you...”

Mrs. Harkness came out from the back. “Is it done?”

“Yes, yes, the two brats have both gotten what you wanted them to have. Now what?”

“Now we prepare to let chaos rule All Hallow’s Eve, to create a sustainable future...”

~~~~~~

At Spike’s warehouse lair, the British undead also known as William the Bloody was watching the video that his minion had taken of Buffy’s fight the previous night. The platinum-blonde Master vamp chuckled and said in his North London accent, “She’s tricky. Baby likes to play...”

The scene where the Slayer dusted the vampire with the sign was shown, and Spike said out loud, “You see that? The way she stakes him with that thing? That’s what’s called resourceful. Rewind it again.”

His mad sire, the brunette female vamp called Drusilla, came in from the other room. She was fussing about her doll and said in her own British accent, “Miss Edith needs her tea.”

The vampire originally dubbed with the name “Willy” was suddenly instantly affectionate, “C’mere, poodle...” as he held his hand out to her.

Drusilla took the proffered hand. “Do you love my insides? The parts you can’t see?”

Spike reassured her, “Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet. That’s why I’ve got to study this Slayer. Once I know her, I can kill her. And once I kill her, you can 'ave your run of SunnyHell. Get strong again.”

Her psychic antennae vibrating, Dru suddenly murmured, “Oh, my. Everything’s switching. Outside to inside...” She breathed at Spike’s neck, “It makes her weak. The Slayer.”

The Big Bad was curious. “Really? Did my pet 'ave a vision?”

Drusilla nodded. “Do you know what I miss? Leeches.”

The male vamp ignored that, “Come on, talk to Daddy. This thing that makes the Slayer weak? When is it?”

The crazed undead looked away. “Tomorrow.”

The guy who had loved to play with railroad spikes, ever since the second week of rising from his grave, was confused. “Tomorrow’s Halloween. Nothing happens on Halloween.”

His creator replied, “Someone’s come to change it all. Someone new...” Then Dru started to shake and shiver, “Oh! Oh no! It’s terrible, my Spike! So, so 'orrible! The stars are screaming in agony, they are!”

“What? What?” Spike was getting concerned now.

“The wicked seer, she’s gone 'n made a virtuous warrior and a disgraceful grave robber!” The offspring of Angelus turned to stare at her own childe, “Don’t go out tomorrow night, my precious 'eart! The white knight – he’ll try to chop off your 'ead, he will!”

But Spike refused to take serious heed of the warning, “We still got a shot at killing the Slayer though, right luv? So, can’t afford to miss out on that. Besides, 'aven’t met the human yet what could take me in a fight...”

Dru groaned, “No, no, no. It’s all gonna go wrong, it will, like – like little Anne suckin’ her lemons upside down, 'n inside out...”

~~~~~~

In the back room of Ethan’s shop, he and Mrs. Harkness entered through the curtain. “Do the worship ritual, if you must,” she told him. “But make sure nothing is changed for tomorrow night...” Then the woman stepped aside, and stood silent.

Ethan knelt before his statue of Janus; he then pressed his hands together, and winced in pain. When he pulled them apart there were wounds in his palms, and blood flowing freely from them.

The British man then chanted, “The world that denies thee, thou inhabit.” He dabbed the blood from his left hand with his right middle finger, and smeared it over his right eyelid. “The peace that ignores thee...” He took the blood from his right hand with his left middle finger, and rubbed it over his left eyelid. “...thou corrupt.”

Rayne then utilized the blood from his left hand with his right middle finger again, and traced out a cross onto his forehead. “Chaos. I remain, as ever, thy faithful, degenerate son...”

~~~~~~

Friday, October 31st, 1997

The next day in Buffy’s bedroom at 1630 Revello Drive, the blonde in question was looking into her long mirror, wearing her gown and a long, black wig. She put on the second of a pair of earrings, and looked satisfied at her ravishing appearance.

Willow was in the bathroom, changing. “Where’re you meeting Angel?” she asked.

Buffy replied, “Here, after trick-or-treating. Mom’s gonna be out.”

The redhead questioned, “Does he know about your costume?”

The Slayer said simply, “Nope. Call it a blast from his past; I’ll show him I can coiff with the best of 'em...” Getting impatient the hazel-eyed girl turned to the bathroom door, “Okay, Willow, come out. You can’t hide in there all night!”

The future witch stuttered, “O-okay, but, but promise you won’t laugh?”

Her friend replied at once, “I promise.”

Willow opened the door, and came out looking absolutely gorgeous. She was wearing boots, a short, black leather skirt and a burgundy, long-sleeved, V-necked, midriff-baring top. The problem was she was also very uncomfortable and felt like a laughing-stock, and thus the amateur computer hacker quickly stepped over to her ghost sheet and picked it up.

Her personal wardrobe manager smiled hugely, “Wow! You’re a dish!” Willow just tried to hide herself with the sheet, but Buffy firmly took it from her and tossed it aside. “I mean, really.”

The girl whose family disliked Thanksgiving was still very uncomfortable though, and tried to cover herself with her arms. “But this just isn’t me...”

Buffy just said firmly, “And that’s the point!” She walked around Willow, to show the skimpily-clad teen her reflection in the mirror. “Look, Halloween is the night that not you is you, but not you. Y’know?”

The doorbell rang and the blonde Champion said at once, “Oh! That’s Xander. Are you ready?”

Willow was now über-nervous at the thought of her permanent childhood crush seeing her like this. “Yeah. O-o-okay.”

Buffy smiled, “Cool! I can’t wait for the boys to go non-verbal when they see you!” Then she went to get the door, even as Willow started trying to cover herself up again.

Heading downstairs, the Casa del Summers resident trudged down the steps and opened the door for Xander. She saw him wearing blue jeans, old white sneakers, a white shirt underneath a brown jacket, along with a nondescript trenchcoat; and he was holding the toy sword. As well as having a lot of bruises on his face... “Xander, what happened to you?!”

The young man shrugged; he had forgotten that this would be the first time the girls would see him banged up like this, as he hadn’t been at school today. “Had a little run-in with Larry. Don’t sweat it though, I’m all right...”

That didn’t comfort the Chosen One much, and she couldn’t help completely forgetting their previous conversation on the subject. “Well, but you’re still hurt! I, I should have been there to help you, somehow...” she started to come forward in obvious ‘worried mother’ mode.

Xander tried not to let her words make him feel completely gutted, as his hopes for a romantic liaison with the Slayer suddenly took a final, horrible, death blow. < It’s so obvious, why didn’t I see it before? Deep down...I’m totally unable to look after myself, as far as she’s concerned... > “Buffy, please! I know whereof I speak – Rodney Munson beat me up every day for five years, remember? Trust me on this...”

The costumed blonde quickly told herself, < Better not make that much of a big deal about it, because of that ‘guy code’ thing. Oh, who am I kidding? It’s Xander here! > “You’re sure? 'Cause I could get ice...”

Then the former King of Cretins noticed her costume, and said by way of distraction, “Yeah, and look at you! Lady of Buffdom, Duchess of Buffonia, I am in awe! I completely renounce spandex, as my choice of outfit for women!”

The image of an English lady finally relaxed and curtsied, “Thank you, kind sir.” Xander almost bowed in return. Then the Slayer started to ask, “Uh, and what are you supposed to be dressed up as-?”

The daughter of Hank and Joyce Summers then saw his annoyed expression, and wisely changed the subject. “Well, um, anyway, i-it’s great. But wait till you see...”

They turned to look up the stairs at Willow, hearing the noise of footsteps. But the Jewish girl had put on the ghost outfit, unable to deal with her extreme panic attack; and Xander could not help noticing the white bedsheet said ‘BOO!’ on the front, in large bold letters.

The Willster just said shyly, “Hi.”

Buffy trailed off in disappointment, “...Casper.”

Xander said in an upbeat way, “Hey, Will! That’s a-a-a fine boo you got there.”

But then, as she got a good look through the peepholes, the future high school valedictorian was instantly horrified at her friend’s injuries; so she yanked off the sheet, in her hurry to get downstairs and check on young Mr. Harris. < Ohmigod! Ohmigod! Ohmigod! >

Buffy closed the door as Willow examined his face and forehead worriedly and babbled, “Xander! Xander! You’re hurt. How did you get hurt? Oh, this is bad. What, what happened? Who happened? Who did this to you? Did-”

Initially annoyed again Xander ignored all that however, and stepping back his eyes almost bulged out at her revealing costume. “Will! Don’t worry, I’m fine despite appearances – but great googly-moogly, look at what you’ve got on!”

Willow was instantly terribly self-conscious, as her cheeks went scarlet and she tried to put on the bedsheet again. But he didn’t let her, “Hey, no, stop! No way, Wills – trust me; you gotta go out tonight lookin’ like that, and not some wimpy chain-rattler. Cordy and her sheep will never even know what hit 'em; and hopefully, it’ll give Snyder a heart attack! Which would serve him right, for everything he’s done to us lately...”

Willow looked at Buffy for support, but she just had that huge grin plastered all over her face again, and so the red-haired girl miserably acquiesced to their desires. < I really gotta learn to stand up for myself one day... > She then said to Xander, “And who are you supposed to be?”

The Xandman sighed in despair but quickly grinned, “Ladies, behold the one and only...” then he said in a lousy attempt at a Scottish accent, “Connor MacLeod, of the clan MacLeod. For in the end, there can be only one...”

The girls looked at him without comment, then just burst out giggling. And Xander didn’t need to hear them say it, to realize they would have tried to talk him into getting something else if they’d been there...

~~~~~~

At the high school, children were arriving in costume to be taken trick-or-treating. Buffy was thus standing in the hall by the stairs holding a clipboard, waiting for her charges.

Snyder brought them to her, as well as his own bad attitude. “This is your group, Summers. No need to speak to them. The last thing they need is your influence! Just bring them back in one piece, and I won’t expel you.” He started to leave...

The young woman bent down to the kids and said to the kids, “Hi.”

Snyder said at once, “Ah, ah!”

Buffy straightened back up, and rolled her eyes. After he was gone she thought about what Xander had said earlier and murmured to herself, “You need me to kick your ass anyway, ya little troll...”

One of the little girls turned to her friends, “She said ass! I’m telling...”

Miss Summers instantly knelt down again, “No, no, you-you don’t wanna do that. Candy?”

Xander was close by to them when Larry came past dressed as a pirate and said to him, “Harris – just so ya know, after tonight is over? I’m going to finish the job I started doing on your face...”

He jumped at the so-called Idiot Jed, making him flinch; then Larry laughed directly in Xander’s face, and continued on down the hall. The two-dollar costume king raised his toy sword in defiance, but then just dismissed the retreating bully from his mind.

Elsewhere, Oz was checking his guitar at his locker. And as luck would have it Cordelia came into the hall, wearing a very cleavage-y black outfit along with black combat shorts; her hair was in a long plait, and she also had two fake guns on her hips. All of the boys in the corridor were practically drooling at the sight of her, even more so than usual...

Uncharacteristically ignoring the attention, Cordelia walked up to the musician, “Oz! Oz!”

The soon-to-be werewolf looked up at her, the one unfazed male in the crowd. “Hey, Cordelia. What are you supposed to be dressed up as?”

Rolling her hazel eyes, the beauty queen replied, “My last-minute, no-other-choice Lara Croft costume. And just between us, I swear I would have looked ten times better in that cat outfit I was originally planning to get! But hey, are you guys playing tonight?”

The guy who often dreamed of reaching E-flat, diminished ninth nodded sagely. “Yeah, at the Shelter Club.”

Cordelia looked annoyed. “Is Mr. I’m-the-lead-singer-I’m-so-great-I-don’t-have-to-show-up-for-my-date-or-even-call gonna be there?”

Oz just said deadpan, “Yeah, y’know, he’s just going by ‘Devon’ now.”

The cheerleader ignored his dry sarcasm. “Well, you can tell him that I don’t care, and that I didn’t even mention it. And that I didn’t even see you. So that’s just fine.”

The young man could not help being somewhat confused, “So, what do I tell him?”

Cordelia snapped, “Nothing! Geez! Get with the program.” She then walked off in a huff.

Daniel Osborne said even more sarcastically to himself, “Why can’t I meet a nice girl like that?”

At that moment, Willow came down the hall in her Goth girl outfit; she had just barely gotten used to all the looks she was receiving, from both sexes of the student body. Oz turned around, and bumped right into her; his eyes nearly popped out of his head and he said, “Oh! I’m sorry.”

The redhead looked away. “Me too. Sorry, that is.”

But Oz was still ogling her. “I’m really sorry.”

Willow said at once, “Yeah. Sorry. Uh, I gotta go.”

Osborne nodded, suddenly finding it hard to keep his trademark coolness factor around this specimen of stunning female loveliness. But he needn’t have gotten worried... “Me too.”

Thus Oz and Willow continued down the hall on their separate ways, but then the boy turned around again and seriously checked her out. < Man. Who is that girl? >

Not far away, Xander was briefing his group of kids – with his own special brand of Harris wisdom. “Okay, on sleazing extra candy: tears are key. Tears will normally get you the double-bagger. You can also try the old ‘you missed me’ routine, but it’s risky. Only go there for chocolate. Understood?” The children all nodded their little heads. “Okay, then let’s get going...”

~~~~~~

Later out on the streets, nightfall had come. A student dressed as a vampire was escorting his own group of the bratty little prepubescents; and they walked by Buffy’s group, coming back from a house.

The blonde born in L.A. stopped and crouched down, to see what they’d gotten. She asked, “What did Mrs. Davis give you?”

They all pulled out toothbrushes, and the Chosen One almost blanched. “She must be stopped...”

The Slayer then got up, talking to her group of kids, “Let’s hit one more house. We still have a few more minutes, before I need to get you back...”

~~~~~~

In the back room of Ethan’s shop, the man of the hour prepared himself to incant a spell in Latin, as Mrs. Harkness silently stood there behind him ‘watching’. “It is time,” she intoned unnecessarily.

Ethan nodded and finished the preliminaries. He then said, “Janus, evoco vestram animam. Exaudi meam causam. Carpe noctem pro consilio vestro. Veni, appare et nobis monstra quod est infinita potestas.”

The translation echoed in the blind woman’s mind, “Janus, I invoke your spirit. Hear my plea. Seize the night for your own reason. Come, appear and show to us that which is infinite power.”

~~~~~~

At a house elsewhere, Willow followed her charges along the porch to the front door. “C’mon, guys...”

One of the kids, who was wearing a green monster mask on his head, rang the bell and stepped back. An old lady answered the door, and the kid with the mask pulled it down over his face.

All the kids chanted in unison, “Trick-or-treat!”

The lady smiled in genuine pleasure, “Oh my goodness, aren’t you adorable!”

~~~~~~

Back in the shop Ethan chanted, “Persona se corpum et sanguium commutandum est. Vestra sancta praesentia concrescet viscera. Janus! Sume noctem!”

Mrs. Harkness’s brain said silently at the same time, “The mask transforms itself into flesh and blood. Your holy presence curdles the heart. Janus! Take the night!”

~~~~~~

A wind began to blow on the streets, as Buffy sensed something wasn’t quite right. Not far away at the residence where the old lady was with Willow’s kids, the homeowner looked into her empty bucket and said, “Oh, dear! Am I all out? I could’ve sworn I had more candy...”

The kid wearing a red rubber cap with horns suddenly morphed into a horned, red-skinned real monster. The woman didn’t notice and said, “I’m sorry, mister monster...” She bent down, “Maybe I...”

The kid with the green mask had changed into a demon also; so he grabbed the lady by the neck, and began to cold-bloodedly choke her.

The other children just screamed and ran away. Willow shouted in confusion, “No! Let her go!”

The red demon attacked the green one, and he let go of the woman. The two monsters started to tear at each other’s throats as Willow kept shouting, “Stop! What’re you doing?!”

The old lady quite sensibly ran into the house, and slammed the door shut. The redheaded guardian of the children just ignored that and yelled, “Stop! Hey!”

She went to separate them, but both demons growled loudly at her; and that quickly cured Willow of any silly notions of trying to play hero. The two monsters then got on with the business of fighting, and it didn’t appear as if they would stop anytime soon.

On the street, Xander was just standing there – watching all the parents and children running around him. Things were being thrown about, and windows were being carelessly smashed; basically, chaos was erupting everywhere.

Willow ran onto the street, looking for her other charges; but they had all disappeared. Then Xander suddenly jerked back, like he’d just been hit by something. He bent over slightly, looking down and lowering his toy sword.

Willow then watched in amazement as Xander’s various bruises were instantly healed, as blue-white lightning bolts danced over the wounds; then the guy suddenly knew himself to be the Scottish-born Immortal named Connor MacLeod, as the katana became the razor-sharp real Masamune weapon.

Willow shouted, “Xander? Xander!” The man looked up, and pointed his sword at her. “Whoa, don’t! It’s me, Willow!”

Xander responded instantly in a thick Highlander accent, “Aye, blossom – fer all I know, that may be true. But then, I don’t happen ta know anyone named after a tree...”

Willow sounded annoyed, “Xander, quite messing around. This is no time for jokes! Now, what just happened with that lightning thing-y? How did your injuries just vanish?”

Xander was surprised at her mention of the Quickening, “Was I hurt just now, then?” Then he looked around carefully and demanded, “Ah, never mind that – what the hell’s goin’ on? This is the States, not Scotland where I was just at a few seconds ago. And where’s Brenda?”

Willow looked confused. “Who?”

Xander glared at her. “My wife!”

Willow started to believe he wasn’t kidding, as she suddenly noticed his frame looked a lot less scrawny than she remembered. “Oh, boy. She’s, uh, she’s not here. And you, um, you really don’t know me, do you?”

Xander swung the katana away from her, and again looked at the chaos all around him. “No I don’t, little tree, but I suggest we go find cover. Things are that mad around here, and so we’d best be leavin’...” He started walking to her.

“No, Xander, wait! There’s some things I have to tell you...” When the brown-eyed man in the trenchcoat got close enough, she grabbed hold of his arm in her urgency.

But the would-have-been butt-monkey of the Scooby gang shook her off and said, “Don’t grab at me like that, woman!” He then sighed, “Well, what is it yer wantin’ to say?”

Willow said urgently, “Xander Harris, you gotta listen to me! Things have gone all kablooey-”

Xander interrupted in confusion, still unsure if this was the alias he was using around here or it was just a case of mistaken identity. “Harris? Huh. I’m actually usin’ the name of that part o’ the family now?”

Willow ignored that and said, “Something crazy is happening. You’re, um, you’re not who you think you are! The kids I was with, they were dressed as monsters, and now they are monsters. And you...you dressed up as that character in the Highlander movie, and so now I guess you really are the Immortal Connor MacLeod...”

Xander’s eyes went wide. “So – ye know all about my kind?” Then he scoffed, “But as for the rest o’ that...come now! I know perfectly well who I am, have done fer nearly 500 years. Ye actually expect me to believe all that stuff you’re sayin’?”

A monster appeared across the street, growling its head off. Xander pointed his 2000-year-old sword towards it and did a few practice swings, in a threatening fashion. But the beast ignored him and moved away as Willow jumped in front of the Highlander, “No! Don’t kill anyone! That’s still a little kid in there!”

Xander said impatiently, “Step outta the way, ye foolish little girl!”

But Willow said firmly, “No killing! That’s an order!”

He who had been Xander Harris abruptly lowered the weapon, with a sudden smile at her courage in the face of an armed adversary. The ancient man then decided to follow her lead for now, as in his experience those who were so passionate about something – usually had a damn good reason for being so.

Willow then said, “We just need to find...” The daughter of Ira and Sheila Rosenberg quickly spotted the Slayer. “Buffy!”

The schoolgirl ran across the street over to her friend, as Xander followed. Willow then said, “Buffy! Are you okay?”

The monster suddenly reappeared with a friend, and they both roared as they approached the trio. The warrior who had often gone drinking with Benjamin Franklin quickly raised his katana, “Now this could be trouble...”

Willow just said urgently, “Buffy, what do we do?”

The woman in question instantly fainted and fell to the ground.

~~~~~~

The Highlander quickly took charge and attacked the approaching demons, but took care not to stab them in any vital spots; appreciating the danger, the two creatures turned and ran off. Xander then lowered his sword and grunted in annoyance, “Ah, Ramirez, ye overdressed Spanish peacock – I surely wish you were here right now, to help me understand all this...”

Willow was kneeling beside Buffy, who had woken up by this time and was lying against a tree after the redhead has dragged her there. “Buffy, are you alright?”

Buffy replied, “What?”

Xander said as he came over, “She asked if ye were hurt...”

Willow asked too, “Yeah, Buffy, are you hurt?”

Buffy sat up. “Buffy?”

The pathologically shy nerd said in horror to Xander, “She’s not Buffy.”

The son of Anthony and Jessica Harris just stared back, “Who exactly is this Buffy, then?”

Willow groaned, “Oh, this is gonna be fun...” She turned to her former friend. “What year is this?”

Xander took Buffy’s hand and helped her up as she replied, “1775, I believe-”

The possessed young man disagreed at once, “No, it’s 1985.”

Willow said somewhat apologetically, “Actually, it’s Halloween 1997...”

The Highlander looked at her in astonishment, and then said in confusion, “If that’s true – then where the hell have I been, for the last 12 years? And why can’t I remember?”

Buffy was confused and hyperventilating, “I-I don’t understand. Who are you people?”

Willow said in reassurance, “We’re friends.”

The former Spordelia of Hemery High stammered, “F-friends of whom? Y-your dress...everything is strange! How did I come to be here?”

Willow replied as sincerely as she could, “Breathe, okay, breathe. You’re gonna faint again...” She then said to Xander, “How are we supposed to get through this without the Slayer?”

The guy who had recently been running a New York antique shop in the 1980’s just looked at her. “Slayer? I’m sure I’ll regret askin’, but what exactly does that talentless thrash band have ta do with any o’ this?”

A monster came around the tree behind Buffy and roared, fangs bared and claws raised to attack. Buffy screamed and backed off, shocked out of her wits...

But the man who remembered fighting alongside George Washington during the War of Independence jumped in without hesitation. And using an old move from the Continental army Xander whacked the monster on the nose with the dragonhead handle of his sword, knocking it down and out. “I suggest we get indoors, 'fore we come across anything that’s...”

Buffy started screaming, “A DEMON! A DEMON!” She got behind Xander. “A DEMON!”

A sport utility vehicle came driving down the street with its headlights on. Willow saw it and just said quickly, “That’s not a demon. It’s a car!”

Buffy was still afraid, though. “What does it want?”

The spellbound male teenager had had enough of the craziness. “Is it just me, or has the daft woman gone completely insane? Even the Boston Tea Party wasn’t this mad!”

Willow shrugged, “She’s never seen a car before.”

The 16½-year-old boy couldn’t believe it. “She’s never seen a car? How in the name o’ Culloden Moor is that possible?”

The refined, dark-haired beauty in the gown started in recognition of the place where the infamous Battle of Culloden had occurred some 29 years ago, in her mind. And remembering the stories her imaginary father had told her about the Scottish Highlanders then...Buffy understood the man before her right now was most likely not to be trusted.

Willow said helplessly, “She’s from the past, remember? Now let’s get somewhere safe.”

Xander shook his head. “She’s from the past. And I’m not real? I just want ye to know, child, that in all my 479 years – I’ve never taken anythin’ so much on faith before!” He sighed and asked Willow, “Now, where do ye suggest we go?”

The female Scooby thought furiously, “Where’s the closest...we can go to a friend’s!”

Buffy then tried to get away from them, saying to Willow and Xander, “I’m not going anywhere with you two, you-you obvious harlot with your Highland barbarian accomplice...”

Time means nothing, on certain occasions; and this was one of them, as Xander got insulted at the racial slur despite – or perhaps because of – the age that he thought he was. < Bloody snob Englishwoman... >

The Highlander then said in slight annoyance, “We’ve obviously no time for hysterics, m’lady...” as he grabbed and carried a struggling Buffy on his shoulder towards her home, following blindly after Willow.

~~~~~~

Later at 1630 Revello Drive, Xander dumped his cargo, opened the kitchen door and scanned the room. “It looks all clear, lass!”

Willow walked in and called out, “Hello? Mrs. Summers?” There was no response. “Good, she’s not here yet.”

Xander closed the door as Buffy asked, looking fearfully at him, “Where are we?”

Her best female friend replied, “Your place. Now, we just need to...”

A banging at the front door was then heard. Xander went to investigate it, and Willow and Buffy followed him; the Net Girl ordered her oldest bud, “Don’t open it!”

The slayer of the evil Immortal known as the Kurgan again just looked at her. “It could be a citizen in need o’ help, ya know.”

The future Wiccan riposted, “Or, it could be a mini-demon!”

Buffy noticed a picture on a table, and went over for a closer look. She picked it up, and saw it was an image of herself wearing a spaghetti-strap top. The girl turned around, and as Willow came over to her the lovely-but-dumb woman said hesitantly, “This...this could be me...”

Willow said urgently, “It is you. Buffy, can’t you remember at all?”

The possessed Slayer replied at once, “No! I, I don’t understand any of this! Uh, uh, th-this is some other girl!” She put the picture back and said vehemently, “I would never wear that, that low apparel, and I don’t like this place, and I don’t like you, and I surely don’t like him, and I-I-I just wanna go home!”

The future Mistress of Pain shouted, “You are home!”

Buffy was practically in tears at hearing that. Seeing this Willow turned back to Xander in despair, “She couldn’t have dressed up like Xena?”

The former blacksmith was hopelessly confused again, “Who?”

Willow appeared to give up, pressing her face into her palms. “Oh, there is a Hell. There absolutely is, and I’m living in it...”

They subsequently heard screaming outside as Xander looked out through the window, and then he cursed, “Damn it!” The Highlander quickly opened the door and dashed out, most likely to rescue someone, pulling the door closed behind him.

Buffy ran up to the woman of obviously illicit trade, as even though she didn’t trust the barbarian – Xander was still one of the most familiar things she knew in this insane place, and she didn’t want to lose track of him. “Surely he’ll not desert us!?”

Willow shook her head. “Whatever...” She rolled her eyes, and headed into the living room. The Lady Buffy, wide-eyed with fear, followed with nary a whimper.

Outside, Cordelia – or at least, someone who looked like the nastiest girl in Sunnydale’s history – yelled in a British accent as she fought a Sasquatch in hand-to-hand combat, “You’re dead – whatever you are!”

The voluptuous and deadly fighter then rolled clear and pulled out her twin 9mm guns, which were now quite real because of the spell, and took careful aim at Jojo the Dogface Boy. < Got to make each one count... >

“DON’T SHOOT!” she heard a male voice yell, almost right in her ear. The woman paused in surprise; then the brunette saw Xander hit it in the shoulder, punching through with the katana and stunning the creature. < Nice aim... >

The Highlander then grabbed Cordelia, “Come with me!” The Immortal took her by the hand, and led her back to the house after she holstered her weapons.

Willow was watching through the window, on the inside; and as Xander and Cordelia quickly came in through the door she said, “Oh, thank God! Cordy!”

The possessed 16-year-old bitca was completely confused by that, as the door was slammed shut. “Who?”

Realizing the situation the redhead said impatiently, “Okay, your name is Cordelia Chase. You’re not...whoever you think you are, on account of you and the other two here have been possessed by your Halloween costumes! You’re in high school, you’re a cheerleader and we’re your friends. Well, sort of.”

The brunette didn’t believe a word of it. “You’re insane! The name’s Lara Croft...and who the hell are you?”

Willow shrugged, shaking her head at the choice of costume. “Oh great, Lara Croft the Tomb Raider? Well, guess it coulda been worse...uh, I’m Willow Rosenberg; and right now, I’m the only one who seems to vaguely know what’s going on...”

The girl that currently thought she’d been born on Valentine’s Day 1968 sighed, “Well, then I’d appreciate some answers! How did I end up in the U.S.? And I was just attacked by something that looked like what my friend Bryce cooks up for my training programs!” She showed them her torn sleeves and smirked, “Anyone think my butler Winston’s going to be able to salvage these threads? Myself, I don’t fancy it’s likely...”

The Highlander simply shrugged. “We’re alive 'n safe fer the moment. And whatever we can offer ta help ye survive all this, we will.”

The so-called daughter of Lord Henshingly Croft looked at the Scottish man properly for the first time, and definitely seemed to like what she saw. She smiled flirtatiously, “Thanks, and you are...?”

Willow took charge before he could answer and said, “Okay, this is what we’re gonna do! First off, talk to Giles at the library...”

“Who?” “What library?” the questions echoed.

The redhead gave up again and simply went to the phone, but got no dial tone. < Darn. Guess someone has to personally make a run for the high school... > She then sighed, realizing her friends were in no condition to help on this one. “Look, you guys stay here while I get to the bottom of this. If something tries to get in, just fight it off...”

Buffy stammered, “Well, i-it’s not our place to fight. Uh, surely some men will protect us?”

Cordelia said to Willow in amazement, “What on earth is up with her? I mean the attitude, never mind the clothes...”

The single white female tried to explain, “I-i-it’s like amnesia, okay? Like I said, you guys don’t know who you really are. But you will soon, I promise. Just sit tight, I’ll be back...” She started to move towards the door.

Cordelia looked at Xander, “Who made her the boss, then?”

Xander shrugged. “No one, it seems. But times like this, someone’s gotta lead the troops...”

Willow ran as fast as she could once out the door, slamming it shut behind her. Outside, several monsters were chasing people down the street past Spike. The hostile sub-T was in game face – and looking around, the vampire said with a smile, “Well! This is just...neat!”

Drusilla was by his side, having insisted on coming along. Even though she hadn’t yet recovered from her vision earlier, as she muttered, “There’s a mouse in the house, all worried 'bout ruined sweetbreads! Little fingers, all red. Red like overripe cherries, they are...”

The Biggest Bad was getting sick of trying to make any sense out of her ramblings, but did his best to cover it. “There, there, pet. Everything’s just ducky right now, idn’t it? So tell me, any ideas where we can find the Slayer – and I can kill her already?”

The insane vamp just shook her head as she walked; and accepting this, Spike strode on, feeling the thrill of the upcoming hunt course through his veins.

~~~~~~

Back inside 1630 Revello Drive, Buffy said uncertainly, “Surely there’s somewhere else we can go. A-a safe haven?”

Xander replied checking the door, “That redheaded young vixen said ta stay put. And since she seems to know what’s goin’ on, that’s what we’re doin’ fer now...”

Buffy was astounded at the barbarian’s thickheadedness, “You would take orders from a woman? A-are you feeble in some way?”

Xander ignored that, and saw the picture on the floor near Cordelia. “Well, now! What’s this?” he said, and picked it up.

It was a picture of Willow, Xander and Buffy. The Highlander looked at his reflection in the glass surface of the picture of the trio; and finally admitted to himself in amazement, that he truly wasn’t who he thought he was. “My God...”

MacLeod sighed in pain. < I should be happy about this, but I’m not. It’s like I’ve won the Prize and the Game’s finally over, but Brenda’s not here. She doesn’t exist? And Kastagir and Ramirez and my sweet bonnie Heather, they never existed either? >

Xander turned to Cordy, who was also looking at the photo, “It’s true then, our absent leader must be right. We must all have some kind of amnesia...”

Buffy acted stuffy and superior on instinct, “I don’t know what that is, but I’m certain I don’t have it. I bathe quite often!”

Xander gestured, showing her the picture, “How do ye explain this, then?”

Buffy simply said, “I don’t! I was brought up a proper lady. I-I wasn’t meant to understand things. I’m just meant to look pretty, and then someone nice will marry me. Possibly a baron.”

Cordelia snorted, reminded of the lessons of her older female relatives. Xander himself was sick of Buffy’s attitude, glad that this was no longer the 18th century – the reasons for that drunken farce of a duel on Boston Common during 1783, for example, were still ridiculous to contemplate.

He just drawled, “This isna some high society tea party, woman. Sooner or later, odds are yer gonna hafta fight!”

Buffy asked, “Fight those low creatures?” She then acted snotty, “I’d sooner die!” The noblewoman subsequently crossed her arms, choosing to emphasize her point that way.

Xander’s Highlander persona shrugged, not having a problem with that. “Then you’ll die.”

Cordelia scowled at hearing this, and she definitely appeared not to like him anymore. The centuries-old man then asked the Tomb Raider, again looking into the reflecting glass surface of the photograph, “Ah, who’d the redhead say my name was again? Xander Harris, wasn’t it...?”

The so-called Lara Croft said in annoyance, “How should I know, you pillock?! I wasn’t here then...”

The Immortal just got a funny look on his face, ignoring the insult. “He aye reminds me of me cousin Dugal, when we were children...” Then he asked her, “There’s no chance ye know this boy’s family history, then? Whether or no’ there’s any Scottish blood in him, if he’s a family kinsman-”

Cordelia had had enough of the stupid questions and said, “Oh, for God’s sake – no, you utter berk! If what what’s-her-name, Willow, said is true...none of us even truly exist, remember?!” Then she asked, “What’s the matter with you? Afraid that your manhood’s been compromised by the fact that you’re not real?”

Xander then felt like he’d had enough of the attitude, and instantly placed the katana to the Tomb Raider’s neck; then looking into Cordelia’s eyes he said dangerously, “I’m thinkin’ I’m real enough, blossom, and I’ll wager now so are you. Don’t annoy me again – I’ll tell ye that right now, fer nothin’!”

The glamorous woman Cordy had become was also a determined survivor, and so she instantly withdrew one of her guns in the blink of an eye and pointed it at him. “Get that thing away from my neck, you half-assed lunatic! Or so help me God, I’ll put a bullet through your heart right now!”

Buffy looked terrified, as Xander abruptly removed the sword with a smile. He laughed, “So, you really have no idea what I am? Heh, heh, heh...”

He put the katana away into the loose trenchcoat, and walked up right to the gun – letting it press against his chest. “Whatever else I may be, I am still Connor MacLeod of the clan MacLeod...” Xander put his left hand around her right one, to Cordy’s consternation. “And I am Immortal. I cannot die!”

The Scot pulled the trigger before the weapon’s owner could stop him, and the gunshot echoed thunderously throughout the room. Buffy screamed, as Cordy looked at the victim in wordless shock.

Xander stumbled and fell to his knees, yet had a smile on his face. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back in a minute...” Then he keeled over, losing consciousness.

Buffy was hysterical, of course. “You shot him! You, you murdered him! Who-who-who’ll protect us now?”

“SHUT UP!! And I didn’t shoot him, the mad bastard shot himself!!” Cordelia screamed in a panic, as she tore open the now-bloody white shirt underneath the jacket to examine the terrible wound. “Bloody hell, don’t you die on me...” Her hands getting bloodstained, Cordy then checked for a pulse at his neck; but found none.

The woman long since disowned by her upper-class family then got up and said angrily, “Damn it all, he’s dead. Oh my God, WHY?!? I don’t understand – why’d he shoot himself like that, the demented maniac...” She started to pace around, as her compatriot started to scream again. “Oh, will you stop that?! It’s not helping!”

But Buffy just pointed at Xander’s body, and Cordy turned around just in time to see a flash of lightning disappear across his naked chest. Then the impossible happened; Xander opened his eyes and got up, fully healed.

Tucking in his shirt and checking his weapon, the Highlander simply shrugged, “Like I said, I cannot die...”

Buffy naturally fainted immediately. Cordelia herself was rooted to the spot in shock as the deceptively young-looking man walked over to her. “How-?”

Xander said softly, “I was all but a corpse, when my First Death took place after the battle between the clan Fraser and the clan MacLeod, during 1536. But I rose up the next day, whole and hale. And the villagers chased me away and called me a witch in league with Lucifer for it...” Then his look hardened, “Now, are we clear yet on that not-annoying-me thing?”

The woman who had grown up in boarding schools throughout the world just nodded, still in a daze, as Angel came in from the kitchen. He said in relief, “Oh, good! You guys are all right, it’s total chaos out there...” Then he saw Buffy passed out on the floor, and rushed over to her. “Buffy!”

Cordy and Xander looked at him and said together, “Who are you?”

~~~~~~

At the Sunnydale High library, Rupert Giles (the field Watcher to the vampire Slayer) was going through a stack of cards he’d pulled from the card catalog recently, as part of his official non-Slaying duties at the school. He suddenly heard yelling and sirens outside and looked up, wondering what was going on.

And the next thing he knew, his favorite student Willow Rosenberg had charged through the doors of his sanctum. “Willow?” he asked in surprise after turning around, and putting the cards down.

Willow said, out of breath, “Hi, Giles, we, we, we got big problems!”

Giles replied with upraised eyebrows, “What’s going on?”

~~~~~~

Back at Buffy’s house Angel looked up and said, “Okay, somebody wanna fill me in?” He then appeared to take a sniff, “I smell blood...” Angel looked at Xander, and noticed the ruined shirt. “Yours, Xander?”

Xander sized him up, and then said in a friendly voice, “Aye, that it is. Good eye ya got there, man! Do ye live here, then?”

Angel started at the odd accent, and Xander’s lack of customary insults. “No, and you know that...”

He turned back to the Slayer, and patted her face. “Buffy...” Finally, she woke up. “Hey, are you okay? I’m kinda lost here. You...” he paused. “What’s up with your hair?”

Buffy was hysterical though, as she started clinging to Angel, “Sir, please, you must protect me! He died! The Highland barbarian – he died and came back to life, just like our saviour the Lord Jesus! The saints preserve us, but the Day of Judgement has finally come!”

Angel just looked at her in amazement. < What the hell is going on here? >

Cordelia then said hopelessly, “Look, it’s the understatement of the year, but there’s something weird happening; this girl who was here before, Willow somebody, she said we’ve been possessed by our Halloween costumes. Unbelievable, I know, but it’s the best explanation we’ve got right now! Now, who the hell are you?” she demanded of Angel.

The former Angelus stared at her, now hearing this one’s funny accent. “I’m Angel, I’m a...friend. Uh, Cordelia, do you mean – you three don’t even know who you really are?”

Suddenly the lights went out, and Buffy yelped; then she grabbed Angel again in fear. Xander rolled his eyes and said to the vampire, “Ye better take the princess and secure the kitchen. And you, ye little spitfire, you’re with me.”

Cordelia said at once, “Hey! Who put you in charge now?” Xander just stared at her. Shrugging, the Tomb Raider added, “Okay, but any more funny business – and I’ll shove that sword of yours up your arse or something!”

She followed a grinning Xander, as they went to check out the house. But without warning Cordy suddenly pushed the Immortal man against the wall close by the stairs, and pressed her arm to his neck. The Englishwoman then said with a smile, “Now that we’re alone, I’ll admit – quite the trick you pulled just now, you know. Really had me worried for a second...”

Xander inclined his head slightly with false modesty, but still with a slight grin on his face. “Glad ye appreciated it, ta be sure.”

Cordelia abruptly came closer and said with a speculative look, “I wonder – what’s the story with you and this girl whose body I’ve taken over, anyway?”

That confused him. “What-?”

“Well, first and foremost there’s a sincerely hostile antagonism towards you, I won’t deny that. But deep down, there’s definitely also sexual attraction for that young man you’ve possessed, Mr. MacLeod. I can feel it...”

The Tomb Raider paused at his reaction, and leaned forward to look the Highlander right in the eye, their noses almost touching. “And judging by the sudden color in your cheeks, I’m guessing that’s not exactly a one-way street now either, is it?” She smiled, bringing her lips close to his. “You want me...”

Xander shook his head, getting a grip and cursing this body’s hormones. “Whatever I’m feelin’...it doesn’t matter, not now. Not like this. I’ll thank ye to remember that I’m a happily married man, Miss Croft...”

She instantly moved back, “Hey, I didn’t know that! And it’s Lady Croft, you know.”

“Whatever. But I love my Brenda, and I’ve never cheated on a woman in five centuries, so damned if I’ll start now...”

Cordelia let him go and backed away, the huge smile never leaving her face. “Blast it, but the good ones are always taken, aren’t they? Oh well. Still – you were definitely tempted there for a moment, weren’t you? You can’t deny me that...”

Xander just glared at the adventurous English aristocrat, who was enjoying her revenge a little too much, as they continued on checking out the house.

~~~~~~

In the other room Angel took Buffy’s arm, after she’d finally composed himself, and they went into the kitchen. The former Irishman saw that the door to the outside was open and said worriedly, “I didn’t leave that open...”

The 244-year-old vampire quietly moved towards the entranceway, as he looked around for an intruder. Angel closed the door, looking vigilant; but the basement door behind Buffy opened, and a vampire instantly attacked her.

The former Chosen One tried to push the door closed on him; but that got her precisely nowhere. Coming to the rescue though Angel grabbed the vamp, and wrestled him to the floor.

It was a somewhat interesting fact that this bloodsucker was the student escort that had previously been in vampire costume, even if none of them knew or cared; which explained how the soulless demon had gotten in, without an invitation. Angel just called out, “A stake!”

Buffy said in confusion, “A what?”

Her big hunk of hero sandwich yelled, “Get me a stake!” Buffy looked around, and grabbed a knife she saw on the counter.

“Hurry up!” the Dark Avenger called out. But unfortunately when Angel turned to see what had been keeping her, he had his game face on.

Thus the Buffster screamed at the top of her lungs in fear, when she saw his vampiric features. The woman then ran for the door as Angel yelled, “Buffy, no!”

But it was too late; she just opened the kitchen door and ran away, disappearing into the night.

~~~~~~

At the library, Giles was in pure research mode; within the book cage, he found a stack of old papers. He blew the dust off of them and then came back out, “Willow, h-how’s it going?”

His assistant was leafing desperately through a book, “Giles, I don’t even know what I’m looking for...”

The G-man sighed, “Well, all right, l-let’s, let’s, let’s review.” He set the papers on the table, “Um, so everybody became, uh, whatever they were masquerading as?”

Willow nodded, “Right! Xander was a Highlander movie Immortal, Buffy was an 18th century girl, and Cordelia was an English comic-book character or whatever. And they all became their costumes, right about at the same time...”

The man who was in love with a computer teacher called Jenny Calendar looked thoughtful, but nonetheless confused. “I see. A-and, uh, your, your costume was what, exactly?”

The embarrassed Research Girl covered her midriff with her arms. “Well, I-I was gonna get dressed up as a ghost, 'cause I bought a pretty cool outfit last night; but Buffy and Xander convinced me to go with this instead...”

Giles said at once, “So, so your costume didn’t alter you into anything. Because you changed it at the last minute? A-a-and everyone who changed, they, they, they, they acquired their costumes where?”

The young woman responded, “Me and Buffy got ours at a new place, Ethan’s. Oh!” She appeared to have been struck by a thought. “You think maybe Cordy and Xander got theirs at that place too? I betcha probably Xander did, he was supposed to meet us there last night...”

~~~~~~

Out on one of Sunnydale’s streets Cordelia, Angel and Xander were looking for Buffy. Xander had his katana raised and ready, as he kept an eye out for anything hostile; then the man asked his vampire companion, “Are ye sure she came this way?”

Still unused to his non-hostile manner Angel replied, trying to catch Buffy’s scent, “No.”

Cordelia said idly, “Well, this amnesia thing can’t go on for much longer, can it? So odds are she’ll be okay, right?”

Angel instantly replied, “Buffy would be okay. Whoever she is now, she’s helpless. C’mon!” They move off.

Behind a tree, Spike had been hiding and overhearing their conversation. He turned to the child monsters Willow had been chaperoning, “Do you hear that, my friends?” The demons nodded and growled. “Somewhere out here is the tenderest meat you’ve ever tasted, and all we have to do is find her first!”

Unnoticed by the others, Drusilla released another soft moan, feeling the end of the evening’s events approaching soon...

~~~~~~

In an alley not far from the costume shop, Buffy stopped running, and leaned against a crate. She sniffed and looked around, frightened; and in desperation the noblewoman tried to think of what to do now.

< I’m all alone here, > Buffy thought in mind-numbing horror. < All alone, and no one to trust. On account of if that kind man was one of the monsters, who’s to say the other three aren’t the exact same thing? >

She lifted her skirt a bit, and started to walk on with no real destination in mind. Buffy then turned around to look behind her, having a bad feeling about something, and took a few steps backward.

But when the member of the fairer sex turned around again – her possessed classmate Larry, whom the spell had turned into a real pirate, was there. And he startled the formerly blonde woman, more than a little. < Oh, no. A pirate! What, what’ll he try to do to me? >

The scurvy gentleman o’ fortune just smiled widely at the former Slayer, showing his rotten teeth, and said, “Pretty, pretty!”

Terrified for her virginity Buffy tried to run away, but Larry quickly gave chase – determined not to let his newest prize escape.

~~~~~~

At Ethan’s store, Giles looked around as he and Willow entered. “Hello! Anyone home?”

Willow saw the curtain to the back room partially open. “Giles...” she indicated.

They slowly went in there, and saw the statue of Janus present. Its eyes glowed green and Rupert remarked in a strange voice, “Janus. Roman mythical god.”

Willow asked, “What does this mean?”

Giles replied, “Primarily, the division of self. Male and female, light and dark...”

Ethan appeared and said, “Chunky and creamy. Oh, no, sorry, that’s peanut butter.”

The Watcher stared at the other man, as if he’d just seen a ghost. “Willow, get out of here this instant. Go find the others.”

The redhead started to say, “But...”

The British man who constantly polished his glasses to avoid witnessing the antics of his teenage charges simply shouted, “Now!”

Willow obeyed him and left, as Giles continued staring at the shopowner. He then said a bit too calmly, “Hello, Ethan.”

Ethan just smirked. “Hello, Ripper.”

~~~~~~

In another part of the alley, Buffy backed away from Larry after he had caught up with her. She turned to run again, but tripped and fell.

Cursing silently in a way that would make the aged savants of St. Andrew’s raise their eyes to Heaven, Buffy felt her gown billow out around her as Larry grabbed her tight.

She tried to get up, but he just shoved her against a crate. The pirate version of Mr. Blaisdell pushed her hair away from her frightened face, and moved in to kiss Buffy...at least for starters. < Avast, me pretty, but you’ll do for a decent night’s pleasure... >

At the last moment though Xander came running, and tackled Larry down to the pavement. He got up, and then pulled the would-be felony criminal up and into a metal warehouse door. The Immortal then viciously punched his opponent in the face and gut.

Larry pushed him off and onto the opposite alley wall, and hit his enemy in the gut in return. The Highlander shook it off; then he grabbed Larry’s arm and pulled it behind his back, forcing him to bend over, quickly kneeing him in the stomach.

Cordelia arrived behind Buffy with Angel and said to her urgently, “Hey! Are you all right then?” Buffy saw Angel, yelped and cowered behind a box. “What’s wrong? Come on – get a grip, girl!” the former dreaded enemy of the unpopular and plain-looking demanded.

Buffy stammered about Angel, “He’s, he’s a vampire!’

Cordelia looked around only for a moment, not believing her because of the hysterics, as Larry and Xander continued to exchange punches. “Look, it’s okay. Angel is a good...vampire. He’d never hurt you.”

Buffy slowly stood up. “Really?”

The Tomb Raider nodded enthusiastically. She then glanced at Angel, “Absolutely. He knows us, he’s our friend...”

Larry suddenly attacked Xander with his pirate sword, after withdrawing it from his scabbard. The Immortal quickly countered with his katana, having removed it from his trenchcoat, and so they started to sword-fight.

Cut, block, slash, thrust, parry, Xander seemed to be far more skilled at the armed combat – not surprisingly, since for the Highlander’s kind it literally made the difference between life and death – and he quickly disarmed Larry, as the man’s sword flew away and hit the ground. < Aye, yer not bad ye damned scoundrel, but yer also not good enough! >

Fighting down the instinctive urge to take his head, the Immortal then punished Larry with a wicked right hook, sending him sprawling into a pile of trash.

Angel headed over to where his ‘friend’ was fighting the pirate, as Xander put away the katana and punched Larry again, who had just gotten up – sending him into the pile of trash and a stack of boxes once more. Several boxes fell off of the top, and onto the former football player as he got knocked out cold.

Xander then said in confusion to Angel, “It’s strange, I swear, but takin’ down that pirate...it really gave me a huge sense o’ satisfaction...”

Willow came running down the alley, from the other end. “Guys! Guys!”

Angel called out at once, “Willow!”

The Big W said urgently, trying to catch her breath, “Uh, people, we gotta get outta here!” She looked back, and they saw Spike and his posse coming in the distance.

Xander said at once, “You all get goin’! I’ll keep 'em busy, as odds are they’ll not know how to permanently kill me...”

Cordy asked at once, appearing worried, “Which happens when...”

The Highlander had a savage look on his face, “As my old teacher used to say – if ya head comes away from yer neck, it’s over...”

Lara Croft looked at him, very appreciative of his decision. She then grabbed Xander into a quick but electric kiss, to the shock of everyone present except herself, and whispered, “Then don’t lose your head. And I promise, when this is all over...” The former leader of the Cordettes just left the rest to his imagination with a quirky smile and raised eyebrow, then stepped back.

Angel pointed, “This way! We gotta find an open warehouse...” The ensouled vamp lifted Buffy and carried her away. Cordelia and Willow unhesitatingly followed them.

~~~~~~

At Ethan’s shop, after several moments’ silence the chaos mage said, “What? No hug? Aren’t you pleased to see your old mate, Rupert?”

The other British man simply said, “I’m just surprised I didn’t guess it was you. This Halloween stunt stinks of Ethan Rayne.”

The man in question had an evil look on his face. “Yes, it rather does, doesn’t it? And you must admit, it’s the very embodiment of ‘be careful what you wish for’.”

Buffy’s father figure was disgusted with his old ‘friend’. “It’s sick, brutal, and it harms the innocent.”

Ethan was full of contempt over what he considered to be Giles’ hypocrisy, “Oh, and we all know that you are the champion of innocents and all things pure and good, Rupert. It’s quite a little act you’ve got going here, old man.”

Giles was unmoved by the accusation. “It’s no act. It’s who I am.”

The career criminal spat out, “Who you are? The Watcher – sniveling, tweed-clad guardian of the Slayer and her kin? I think not. I know who you are, Rupert, and I know what you’re capable of.” He then appeared to consider something, “But they don’t, do they? They have no idea where you come from.”

The G-man commanded him, “Break the spell, Ethan. Then leave this place and never come back.”

Ethan laughed briefly, “Oh, Ripper, you’re scaring me so much! But just so you know, the funny thing is – I mustn’t do that yet. As what I’m up to tonight, is a lot more than just simply a prank for my own amusement...”

The former rebel from the 1970’s was now confused. “What are you talking about?”

The shopkeeper explained, “It started out that way, I grant you, but then I learned – look, the entire damn planet hangs in the balance here, old boy. There’s a timetable what has to be followed. Originally, I was planning on letting the spell go on all night; but now...”

The descendant of Cassandra Rayne then checked his watch. “Apparently I have to terminate it in less than five minutes, which is a damn pity – but can’t be helped. The seer I made a bargain with was bloody specific about that; otherwise, you don’t want to know what’s gonna happen in the future...”

Giles didn’t look convinced.

“Oh, bloody hell Ripper! We may both completely hate what the other’s doing nowadays, but when have I ever directly lied to your face about anything?” A momentary pause. “Important? I swear by all our dead friends as well as the mark of Eyghon, this is the real deal...”

The Council operative just stared at him, suddenly uncertain what to believe.

~~~~~~

Spike, Dru and the monsters arrived at where Xander was waiting for them in the alley, walking at a quick, deliberate pace. The human simply stood his ground, and waited for the enemy to make the first move.

The Master vamp smirked at the Highlander, “Well, now, who 'ave we here? I do believe it’s Angelus’s gift from Parent-Teacher Night! And if memory serves – you owe me dinner, whelp...”

Xander just looked at him in instant dislike and said in his Scottish brogue, “So ye know me, I take it? Well now, ye damned Sassenach – what’s yer name then?”

The peroxide one was briefly surprised at the accent, while Drusilla just snapped, “Bad dog! Bite your tongue, for speakin’ like that!”

Everyone briefly looked at her, as Xander raised his katana. Then Spike looked at his future MacHappy meal on legs, dismissing what she’d said... “The name’s Spike, ya dumb wanker. What, you forgot it already? Can’t believe you’re that much of a git...”

Xander didn’t get angry, as the Highlander could remember that he’d been in this sort of situation before, many times over the centuries. “Truth is I never knew it before now, boy. And the name’s Connor MacLeod, of the clan MacLeod...”

Suddenly, as if that was some sort of signal, all the monster minions attacked him at once. Hamstrung by his desire not to kill, Xander batted them aside as harmlessly as he could; but this just gave Spike the opportunity he needed.

Going into game face, the Billy Idol lookalike jumped the swordsman and sent him crashing to the ground. He then growled into Xander’s face, banishing memories of Angelus’ taunts, “Don’t ever call me boy, you stupid sod...”

Xander just had a brief glimpse of the ridged forehead and gleaming sharp teeth and thought, < That’s new... > before William the Bloody descended down like a shark, and sank his fangs into the Immortal’s jugular.

The man struggled, before it was too late; in record time, the blonde demon drained him completely. Spike just got up and smirked afterwards, “Bloody poof tasted like old haggis...” Smacking his lips in distaste, the vampire then scornfully kicked the dead body aside and led his monster squad onwards. “C’mon, Dru!”

Drusilla followed silently mumbling to herself, and glancing back once at the corpse, looking worried.

~~~~~~

Further down in the alley, Cordelia had gotten ahead of the others and found an open warehouse. She yelled, “Over here!”

The woman then pushed the door aside, and all of the good guys hurried inside. The English adventure junkie then told Willow, “Check if there are any other ways in!”

Cordy slid the door closed again, as Angel set Buffy back down on her feet and Willow carried out the photojournalist’s orders. The ensouled vamp quickly said to his beloved, “Just stay here...”

The monsters quickly arrived though, and started pounding on the door from the outside. Angel picked up a large grate, and set it in front of the door on top of some barrels Cordy had already moved into place. He then quickly picked up another grate and set it behind the first one, as the demons began to get the door open...

They pounded against it relentlessly, as the undead champion for the Powers-That-Be tried to hold it in place. But seeing it was hopeless the bloodsucker then yelled to his women, “GOOOOO!”

They all started running again, and Angel followed when he could no longer hold the grating against the attack. The grates fell to the floor, as two demonized children came storming in and pushed the barrels aside.

Spike followed them inside with a loud burp, and looked around. He then led his minions off after the refugees, as Dru brought up the rear...

~~~~~~

Back at the costume shop, Ethan was calmly looking at his watch. “Hmm, tick-tock as the colonials in this effing country say...”

Rupert demanded, “How much longer?”

The willing instrument of the Lords of Chaos shrugged. “Not long. Two minutes or so...”

The ‘Ripper’ was obviously impatient, “It’s been long enough. Now tell me how to stop the spell.”

Ethan smirked, “Manners, Rupert. You could at least say ‘pretty please’...”

Giles just punched him, and the magician gasped in pain after doubling over. The librarian took off his glasses and said simply, “Start talking.”

His former comrade just wheezed, “And you said the Ripper was long gone...”

~~~~~~

Back at the warehouse Spike had caught up with the good guys after a merry chase, and the monsters were holding Willow, Angel and the now-disarmed Cordelia tightly. The male British undead slowly closed in on Buffy as she backed away, trembling; “Look at you. Shaking. Terrified. Alone. Lost little lamb.”

The Slayer had backed up against a crate, and had no place to go any further. And so Spike gleefully slapped her across the face with the back of his hand, “I love it...”

Angel struggled in vain with the two creatures holding him. “Buffy!”

Drusilla went up to Cordelia, who was being held firmly by one of the demons. “You...”

“Who, me?” Cordy said defiantly, not liking the looks of this woman. Everyone stopped at the sight, including Spike – who gazed at the brunette vampiress and the Tomb Raider, wondering what his lady love was up to.

“You’re the one that sees...” the English demoness sired in 1860 said almost dreamily, before her features became a hideous scowl. “Naughty strumpet! Miss Edith says, no tea and cake for you today...”

“Dru...” Spike remarked in annoyance. “We got ourselves a Slayer to kill, remember?” He turned to Buffy, who was whimpering. “Last Slayer I danced with didn’t beg for her life like this, did she? Ah, bollocks, they really don’t make 'em like they used to no more-”

Angel yelled out, “Spike, I’m warning you!! Don’t hurt her, or I’m gonna-”

The bleached-blonde Master vamp just sneered, “You’re gonna what? Take a good look around you, mate. It’s almost time for your own little trip to the woodshed...”

The female British vampire then started shrieking, distracting everyone. “The air! It screams! The Slayer’s knight, he’s comin’ for his friends...” She turned to Cordy, vamping out and raising her claws. “He’ll not have you! Neither will my Daddy! They won’t! They won’t!”

Cordy was amazed by the sight of Dru’s game face, but when the nutty vampiress went to tear the human woman’s eyes out – the brunette quickly leaned back, raised her legs and kicked the former London native across the room. Using the momentum, Cordelia then struggled to get loose of her captor when they hit the wall.

Dismissing all that, once he saw Drusilla was unharmed – Spike turned around, put his left hand around Buffy’s throat, and bent her backward onto the crate. Willow struggled with her two captors while Spike grabbed Buffy’s hair, and closed in for the bite with great anticipation...

All of a sudden, Xander came crashing into the room, barreling through the guards. He saw Spike and Buffy and yelled, “Let her go, ya British bastard!”

The former poet sired in 1880 released Buffy’s hair, and looked back at Xander in sheer amazement. “How the bloody hell-?”

Willow shouted at once, “Him, you can kill!”

The old warrior instantly charged without mercy, and a moment later Spike got moving too; but swinging the katana MacLeod quickly decapitated the soulless demon, before William could get completely out of the way.

The vampire dusted an instant later, all of his potential lost in a timeless moment; and in a higher dimension, a number of plans similarly crumbled into dust as well.

~~~~~~

At the shop Ethan was on the floor, having been beaten up quite a bit. He blearily looked at his watch and then at Giles, “It’s time. If you’ll care to do the honors? It’s Janus, by the way. Break its statue to end the spell...”

Giles quickly grabbed the statue, and lifted it over his head to destroy it. He threw the two-faced graven image hard onto the floor, smashing it into tiny pieces.

~~~~~~

At the warehouse, Angel got free of the distracted demons and punched one in the face, the other in the gut, and then he shoved the second monster into the first.

Not far away, Queen C got loose too as her captor was rendered unconscious; then she kicked a nearby crate and shattered it into pieces, as she quickly armed herself. < Here’s hoping everything in those old Bela Lugosi movies was accurate... >

The very next moment, the boy who was truly Xander Harris again suddenly realized he was only holding a toy sword. “What the...”

The teenage Scooby then saw all the monsters had turned back into children and student escorts. The kids were frightened, and began to cry and complain, especially one loudmouth: “I’m scared! I want my mommy!”

Buffy looked around in confusion, and then tore her wig off in revulsion. “Oh, geez...”

Dru was close to the still-disoriented Slayer, and under other circumstances would have easily torn Buffy’s throat open with her claws before anyone could have prevented it. But fortunately for her and the world, the female vampire was obsessed with something – or someone – else...

Cordy also looked around in confusion, then saw Drusilla growling at her. The running vampiress headed for her target, not even caring that Spike was gone; all that mattered was killing the teenage girl in front of her, after having gotten a feel of Miss Chase’s possible destiny. < You, you wicked thing! Liar, deceiver! You’ll die! Die, I say! >

But the cheerleader abruptly stabbed at her with the sharp wooden stick, having picked up something about slaying vamps by now; her aim perfect, the relatively weak Dru barely had time to scream just once – before Mr. Pointy sent her into oblivion, to join her boyfriend.

Angel looked emptily at the dust that had once been his worst crime as Angelus, having silently witnessed the staking. < I’m so sorry, Drusilla. For everything. I really am. I just hope you can rest in peace now... >

Buffy started looking around, and tried to shake off the oogy feelings she obviously still had. Xander came over to her, “Hey, Buff. Welcome back...”

The effulgent Slayer greeted him in return, “Yeah! You too. Nice job there you just did on Spike, by the way...” Then she looked at Cordy. “Ditto, for that Dru character...”

Xander smiled goofily. “Well, the Xandman aims to please.”

Cordelia was suddenly feeling wiggy, as the reality of the past few hours washed over her. “Uhh! Uhh! Oh my God, I’m gonna be needing industrial-strength therapy for a month for hanging out with you freaks and geeks!” Then she calmed down a little, “Hey, you guys remember everything what happened though, right?”

Buffy nodded, “Oh, yeah. And let me just say, it feels damned good to be 20th-century me again!”

Xander also said in the affirmative, “It was way creepy. It’s like I was there, but I couldn’t get out...”

Cordelia agreed, “Absolutely. And just for the record, I now hate everything to do with merrie old England!” She then looked up at Angel, as he came over to talk to Buffy. “Hey, Angel! I just remembered, you’re a – you really are a vampire...”

Angel ignored her and just said softly to the Slayer, “You okay?”

Buffy replied, “Yeah.”

Angel put his arm around her shoulders, and led her away. “Good...”

Cordelia said indignantly, “Hey! Where are those two going? We were talking here, my lips were moving and...”

Xander shook his head. “Forget it, Cordy. It’s pretty darn obvious those two haven’t got eyes for anything except each other, at the moment! Believe me, I know now when a girl...”

He broke off and Cordelia looked at him, as they were reminded of what had previously happened between them at Buffy’s house and in the alley. Unable to deal at the moment, the two teenagers just looked away and tried hard not to think about that.

The fashion queen sighed, “Well...” She indicated the kids, “I guess you better get them back to their parents?”

Xander looked around. “Sure, everybody seems to...oh! Where’s Willow?”

The so-called reliable-dog-geyser person piped up as they turned around, after having gotten all the kids calmed down, “Right here! And yeah, we better get moving, if we don’t want Snyder to give us like a million years of detention or something for being so late!”

~~~~~~

Saturday, November 1st, 1997

The next day at the costume shop, Giles arrived alone. The place was completely emptied out, as he looked in vain for Ethan – who had vanished the previous night, after the spell was over. And finding nothing the middle-aged gentleman muttered, “Very wise of you not to be here...”

Mrs. Harkness came out of the back room, and said, “Good morning, Mr. Giles.”

The cross-referencing genius said with a start, “Oh! Uh, uh, hello. I’m looking for the proprietor, uh, Ethan-”

She replied cryptically, “He’s gone, but given the circumstances he’ll be back within the month. Ethan was planning to leave a note, but I offered to say his goodbyes in person.”

Giles realized that he knew what she was, “You, you, you’re that seer that Ethan mentioned, aren’t you?”

The hood of the mystery woman dipped a little. “My name is Mrs. Harkness.”

The moniker rang a vague bell for him, but the one-time Locutus of the Borg then demanded to know, “For God’s sake, why did you help him!? Don’t you realize that you’re, you’re legally and morally responsible for all the deaths last night, as much as Ethan is?”

She didn’t deny the charges, “I understood that right from the start...” Then the woman told him, “But there’s something you need to realize; I did what I did for the survival of the many versus the survival of the few, in this sorry world. Even if that meant making decisions others can’t...”

Mr. Cling-To-The-One-Lame-Idea Guy was openly sceptical, “Yes, but I’m afraid such claims do require evidence to back them up – so, can you prove what you say?”

The member of the coven in Devon, England replied softly, “No, not anymore...” Removing her hood, she then told the Big G, “All I can tell you, Mr. Giles, is that I gave up my sight for knowledge of the future, by making a deal with the Spirit Guides. You can believe me, or not...”

The high school librarian tried not to look grossed out at the sight of her face. The visionary then added, “The truth is though I hated what I learned would come to pass. All the pain that you and so many others would suffer...in any case, I decided to change it all, for my own reasons.”

The Tweed Man was briefly distracted by this, but quickly focused back on the big picture. “Ah, ah, hold on; assuming for the sake of argument that, that all this is on the level, however bad it would have been – who, who, who gave you the right to try to change destiny like that? Don’t you realize how, how dangerous and foolhardy your actions were?”

The blind one released a dramatic sigh, thinking of what would have happened from now until 2003. Then she said, “I didn’t want to go into the details, but since you insist...”

The cranky Brit assured her, “Yes, yes I very much insist, as a matter of principle.”

His companion simply said, “Then know the truth of the matter is – the fabric of this reality would have eventually been torn apart, due to two vampires competing for the shanshu prophecy. And before you ask, the writings in question speak of when the vampire Champion with a soul is made human – as a reward for fighting the good fight, and averting the apocalypse.”

The expert on Sunnydale’s weirdness got a strange look on his face and started to say something, but the British seer stopped him, “Mr. Giles, you have your answers now. There’s nothing more I have to say...”

Then Mrs. Harkness simply said goodbye, and disappeared into the back room. But when the Watcher headed in there after her, she was nowhere to be seen.

~~~~~~

Monday, November 3rd, 1997

That lunchtime at the school Xander dragged Cordelia into an empty classroom, after they almost ran away from one another in the corridor – for the third time that day. “Come on...”

“Get your extreme oafish hands off of me!” the former May Queen demanded, almost convincing Xander that she’d gone right back to normal.

He complied and then said, “Okay, see, here’s the thing; we both go to this school, so we can’t avoid each other forever, and that’s why I’m thinkin’ I just get this all over with. So...how’ve ya been coping since last week, C.C.?”

The young woman instantly replied, trying to act uninterested, “Fine, of course. You?”

Xander said with a shrug, “I’m okay too; well, apart from having to remember what it’s like to have lived for five centuries, and all the baggage what comes with that. Like getting married twice, decapitating over 250 people and wanting children more than anything...”

Ignoring his erstwhile enemy’s funny look the former Zeppo then said somewhat hesitantly, “And, uh, I heard you dumped Devon today?”

Cordy asked with a falsetto shrug, “Yeah, but what’s it to you?”

Xander looked at her oddly, asking, “Mind if I ask why ya did it?”

The girl started to look mad as she snapped, “It’s none of your business, mister! But if you absolutely have to know, I got sick and tired of his flaking on me all the time...”

The former freak of nature narrowed his eyes and asked, “Was that that the only reason?”

The cheerleader instantly demanded to know, “What’s that supposed to mean?” But Xander just stared at her, and she got the message. < Damn it, even his clothes look good today! Is it possible he picked up a fashion sense, along with the immortality thing? >

Cordelia looked at the floor, trying not to think about having the standards (and morals) of Lara Croft for appreciating a man – and remembering what she had said last Friday. “Xander, look, you know, about what I said that night in Buffy’s house...and when we left you behind-”

The ex-Immortal cut her off at once, shaking his head, “Don’t go there, Cordy. 'Cause, whatever you think you might be feeling right now? It’s not real. It can’t be. It’s gotta be just leftovers, from her feelings for him. Hey, Lord knows I feel the same way...” Xander then shrugged again, ignoring her wide eyes.

Thinking deeply Cordelia appeared to make a decision and quickly responded, “In that case, let me just say – shut the hell up, Mr. MacLeod!”

Thus saying, she instantly grabbed her nemesis into a frantic, mad kiss. It was wild, desperate and equally as passionate as their hair-pulling contest, but he responded eagerly and they held each other tight in a crazed frenzy of teen lust.

Cordy eventually broke it off, as oxygen became an issue, and said, “You do realize however that this doesn’t change anything between us, right? You’re still one of the losers, and I’m still the one in charge of the elite around here...”

Xander agreed with a small smile, drawing on nearly 500 years worth of memories not to get upset in the slightest. “Oh yeah, I understand completely.”

Cordelia stared at him, and then broke out into a mischievous smile. “Hmmm. On the other hand, maybe I could make a pet project out of you. Help you become someone that’s...up to my standards.”

“Oh, really?” Xander asked with an upraised eyebrow, as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Hell yes, you dorkhead,” Cordy told him playfully, a smile taking the sting out of the insult. “Obviously, it won’t be easy due to your previous immense lameness factor...but still, I’m betting that I can whip you into shape. No doubt though, it’s going to take time. As well as many private lessons.”

“Uh-huh. Well, then, you think maybe we’d best get started right away...?” Xander whispered in her ear.

“Bet your ass we will,” the former Tomb Raider whispered back to him. “I made you a promise the other night. And Cordelia Chase always keeps her promises!”

“I’m glad to hear that...” Xander told her, before they melted together in another long, wet and soul-searing kiss.

~~~~~~

Friday, May 23rd, 2003

Six years later the sun was beating down hard that day, on the workers that toiled within the ancient city of Giza in Egypt. And many of the native people and foreigners had decided to wait till the next day, before continuing working on the various archaeological sites that were scattered around the area.

One American woman, however, couldn’t resist the temptation to be out and about. She was using the shade of a small tent to work on the partially uncovered metal objects; but still, her clothes now reeked of sweat and dirt.

The brunette moved her long ponytail back over her shoulder as it fell, when she leaned in and lay on the ground over the large object. She then carefully and painstakingly used the small, fine tools to remove the thousands of years worth of sand, from the crevices of what was before her.

She had been at it for hours, not even noticing the passing of time. She would have been at it for much longer too, had it not been for her assistant; the young woman called Erica Hogge.

“Dr. Chase!” the grad student called, as she ran quickly from wood bridge to wood bridge to meet her.

“Calm down, Erica. And breathe,” the 22-year-old woman told the girl that she’d handpicked to accompany her on this expedition.

“Oh! Sorry, doctor,” the college student said bashfully, as she panted and tried to regain her breath.

“Please, I’ve told you before! Just call me by my first name,” she told her student. “I’ve only just gotten the degree, you know.”

“Sorry, doc...uh, Cordelia,” Erica shrugged. “But you wanted to know when he got back, right?”

A small grin spilt Cordelia’s face at hearing this. “Yes, and it’s about damn time! I think I better go...yell at him, for being late.”

The other girl already knew that no yelling would be involved; at least, not of the angry kind. “Of course, Cordelia,” Erica told her boss with a shy grin of her own.

Cordy took Ms. Hogge by the hand, and pulled her over to the spot she’d been working on. “I’ve been having a bit of trouble with this one place...” she pointed to an area with a medium-sized dirt clump. “Why don’t you take a crack at it for a while?”

The student looked at it with sudden naked joy. “I’d love to!”

“Great,” the dark-haired woman responded. “I’ll be back later...” she trailed off, as the one-time Lara Croft started for the wooden planks that they called a bridge.

~~~~~~

Five minutes later, after a quick stopover for some cold water, Cordy arrived at the flap to her tent. She quickly fixed her hair for a moment, before going in.

“What in God’s name do you think you’re doing, working in this heat?” the young man waiting for her asked.

“Good to see you too, Harris,” Cordelia told her boyfriend ever since high school, before she walked over and kissed him hello very intensely. When they parted the female asked him, “Did you finally reach any of them?”

The former Highlander nodded. “Managed to talk to Giles and Jenny,” Xander told her. They sat on the cot as he added, “Seems Angel died takin’ out the Hellmouth. So did that Robin Wood guy, as well as a few other people.”

Cordelia sadly leaned her head on his shoulder. “I hope he found redemption for himself at the end, what with that Angelus thing a few months ago...”

“Me too, I guess,” agreed the man who had been visiting the town of Glenfinnan, on the shores of Loch Shiel then.

“But God, Xander!” Cordy told him. “According to CNN, our old home town is gone. Sunnydale has, like, vanished off the face of the earth!”

“Well, then,” the one-time Immortal mused. “Guess it’s a good thing we never got around to buying your old house back, huh...”

She instantly agreed with him, “And that we do all our banking in LA, and other places! By the way, did Giles say if they were okay for money at the moment?”

“Oh, yeah,” her boyfriend told her. “He’s got complete control of all the Council funds nowadays. They’re not hurting in that department, at all.”

“Well, good,” Cordelia said firmly. “But if they need help...thank God we can afford it.”

She got up and re-closed the tent flap, so as not to be overheard. “You know, I am still so completely amazed by it all. I mean in one night, I got all those skills. Aerial ballet, archaeology, photography; and who the hell woulda thought Lara Croft knew her way around the stock market like that?!”

“You ever wonder what would’ve happened if that night hadn’t taken place, or if it had all happened differently?” Xander asked her lazily, as she came back to sit with him.

“Once in a while,” Cordy shrugged. “I mean, if I’d dressed up as a cat like I’d intended to...oh, God, if I hadn’t already had my own accounts and no longer been a dependant on my dad’s taxes...I probably wouldn’t even be able to afford a meal at Burger King, right now! But nowadays I can speak five languages, and make thousands in a day off the stocks markets of three countries...”

“And let’s not forget how damn hot you always manage to look, whenever you’ve got that T-shirt and shorts on. Along with those guns at your hips, of course,” her future husband murmured, as he looked her over.

Dr. Chase just laughed at him. “You are just so easily turned on, you know that mister?”

“Hey!” Xander told her with a grin. “Like I said when we stole that demon spider box way back when...I’m a big fan of the linoleum, and guns have always made me wanna have sex. Plus I don’t know any other girlfriends of mine who can whip out their .38’s, and blow away the bad guys in the blink of an eye!”

“Like you’ve had any real girlfriends, other than me! I swear, sometimes those 500 years worth of memories of yours...” Cordy snapped, as she smacked him on the arm. But then she got a large smile on her face as she added, “Then again, all those fighting moves you picked up that night aren’t half-bad. Lord knows I couldn’t believe it, when you kicked ass against all those El Elimanati creeps that way...”

“Oh, so that impressed you. And is that why you like to watch me work out?” Harris asked innocently.

“You’re all half-naked and sweaty, whenever you do your sword routines. Of course I’m going to take a peek or two!”

Xander looked at her sweat-drenched tank top. “Well, it looks like right now, you’re the one that’s all covered in sweat.”

“Hmmm, I guess I am, aren’t I?” Cordelia said, as she lapsed into her old British accent and looked down at herself. “You think I should get out of these bloody clothes then, I take it?”

“Aye, blossom,” the expert swordsman and antique dealer said, while maintaining a completely neutral face. “That’d be best, no doubt...”

She wasted no time pulling the item of clothing in question over her head, and tossing it over a chair nearby. “Better?” the young woman asked him in her normal voice.

“Muchly,” Xander told her, still with that spookily calm poker face on; despite the fact that his girlfriend hadn’t been wearing a bra...

“You know...” the future mother of three kids said, looking him over. “Your clothes aren’t looking all that hot, either. In fact, you look disgustingly sweaty. We should get you out of them as well.”

Finally, he broke into a huge grin. “Whatever you say, Cor...”

“Oh, you got that part right, Harris!” Cordelia exclaimed, as she shoved him down onto the cot. Laughing and giggling, the Chase woman quickly tore off Xander’s shirt, as they started to make out with a passion previously unknown to the both of them.

The End